In the life of a couple, the boat can become an unwieldy presence. But before coming to a crossroads and deciding whether to sell the boat or land the wife or companion, it is good to have in mind what kind of seafaring woman you are dealing with and to be able to find a key to solve the cohabitation on board. Who knows how many sea wolves, when recruiting the crew, will have thought about what kind of women to bring on the boat, and how many women in turn will have thought about building an all-female crew to avoid clashes with the male know-it-alls. So the difficulty in tolerating each other lies on both sides, but there is a way to come together that starts with understanding the type of person in front of us. Once you have framed the character temperament you have decided to bring on board, it will be easier to find ways to get along. In the vast landscape of characters you might come across, we have outlined eight characters, describing their characteristics, mannerisms, and needs. Who knows how many times you have already dealt with them, or how many stories you have already heard from friends returning from a vacation. But let’s go in order, if in your summer plans you are preparing a cruise from San Remo to Istanbul you better not take with you “The Woman Who Never Has to Ask,” the first type we are going to introduce you to. Photo above of Patrick Demarchelier taken from Vogue America.
TYPOLOGY “THE WOMAN WHO NEVER HAS TO ASK”
The idea of basking on the deck for entire days in the sun, sprinkled with tropical oils and gently rocked by the waves is what leads the harasser to accept the invitation. That is not to say that boating does not appeal to her and that if stimulated she may not become passionate about it. But be careful, because in addition to slipping on the blanket greased by her creams, you will also have to deal with her recklessness: she will try to catch the sun’s rays even with force eight, lying downwind, because otherwise the jib will overshadow her. A meeting in the living room before the cockpit might be useful, among other things, to warn her against embarking with a rigid Samsonite. It won’t be a drama when you see the stanchion sprinkled with her twenty swimsuits-just point out to her the importance of having a clear deck when maneuvering. The harasser will take out all your water supply, because she usually makes use of the taps as at home and after each bath she will demand a long hot shower…she will probably drain your batteries, because she tends to leave the lights on. But again, it will be enough to make her understand that water and batteries are not really options. Even she will not like the idea of finding herself dry, in the dark, and in case of flat, without an engine